Up: [[Eight Gates of Wisdom - Angeles Arrien]] Related: [[The Self]], [[Values]] Created: 2026-02-27 ![[Gate - Bone.webp|300]] These are whale bones, but you get the idea. This is the gate for getting rid of all pretence and being *the bones of who you are*, meaning [[The Self]]. #### The Task The task is to release all of the barriers to authenticity, which includes things like cynicism, pretensions, comparison to others, and the desire to be accepted. And in their place, we daily befriend four symbolic bones in our body that indigenous peoples say we need in order to return to our true nature and cultivate wisdom. They are the: - backbone —the courage to stand by our core [[Values]] - wishbone — staying open to hope — dreams, blessings, possibilities - funny bone — a sense of humour, which will foster joy and support flexibility - hollow bone — trust, openness, curiosity, faith #### The Challenge The challenge is to drop our self-deceptions, especially the two illusions that other people are responsible for our happiness, and that we can change other people. We have to develop the inner strength to live aligned with our personal values, values which support our character. If we do this, we can experience what [[C. G. Jung]] referred to as a *winter grace*. If we don’t, also from Jung, we’re likely to become cynical, defensive, depressed, and resentful. #### A Practice or Two Take actions to strengthen or realign each of the four bones so that all of them are developed equally. Practice saying only what you mean, and doing what you say you’ll do. #### The Gift Alignment of intention, word and action to our core values means that we are also aligned with the four bones. The gift of this will be integrity, honesty, and wisdom. The ultimate gift is that we end up *fully engaging in life rather than merely rehearsing it.* (p.113) #### Prompts to Consider - Where is cynicism present in your life? - What actions can you take to break through the two primary illusions of life: that someone is responsible for your happiness, and that you have the ability to change others? - What triggers your need to diminish or inflate your self-worth? - What do you trust unshakably in yourself? This is the foundation where character, wisdom, and authenticity reside. - When and with whom are you completely yourself, without fabrication or pretence? - What are the benefits of coming fully into your authentic self and bringing your gifts into the world? (p. 116) > [!user] [[Angeles Arrien]] in *The Second Half of Life: Opening the eight gates of wisdom* > The Bone Gate: Authenticity, Character, and Wisdom