Up: [[Analysis]] Created: 2023-03-25 Updated: 2023-11-23 > [!Orbit] D.H. Lawrence > Are you willing to be sponged out, erased, canceled, made nothing…dipped in oblivion? If not, you will never really change. A dark night of the soul is not the same as having a hard time or feeling a bit depressed. It is a long-lasting, intensely disturbing, spiritual trial where we feel empty and lost and after which, we are different. Something that was true of us before has come to an end. We don’t make a choice to descend into a dark night. It is done to us. When it happens, lots of people, and some forms of therapy, try to ignore or overcome the darkness and ‘get happy’. This usually doesn’t work and leads instead to [[16 - Tower]] moments. The goal of Jungian psychology is meaning, not happiness. Authentic suffering is part of reality. In depth psychology, the goal is not to get rid of suffering, which is impossible, but to work towards an enlarged consciousness that can accept the suffering and hold it in a [[Tension of Opposites]]. Conscious acceptance of suffering is not easy because the [[Ego]], which is the centre of consciousness, sees its role as security, and to that end will try to shut down conflict. What is wanted in depth psychology is for ego to stay open and willing to negotiate with Self and the world. What we need is to get close to the suffering and find the meaning. I asked Helen if my feelings of being lost and disconnected from myself are examples of dark night of the soul. She says that while I have touched into the depths a number of times and therefore have had some dark night moments, a full-on dark night of the soul is a level of despair that shows as a major depressive event.