Up: [[Eight Gates of Wisdom - Angeles Arrien]]
Related: [[The Self]]
Created: 2026-02-25
![[Gate - White Picket.webp|300]]
White picket is the gate for shedding our over-identification with roles and expertise developed earlier in life, so we can discover our essence, which Jung refers to as [[The Self]] and Arrien as our “true face.”
#### The Task
Who are you when the [[Persona or Mask]]s have been stripped away? Who are you independent of your work life, your history, your relationships? The task at this gate is to start to find out, by releasing your [[Ego]]’s hold on your old ways of being, and by integrating all five of your essential faces — child, youth, adult, elder, and essence.
#### The Challenge
The challenge at this gate is for the ego to relinquish primary authority to [[The Self]]. This requires that we stop looking to others for acceptance and approval, and that we stop performing and hiding behind false identities and masks.
In his book *Shadow Dance* David Richo has an acronym for the ego’s FACE: Fear, Attachment, Control, and Entitlement (or the need to be special). These are what need to be dismantled. If they are, we feel disoriented and people who have known us to be a certain way may be upset. If they aren’t dismantled, we can’t become who we truly are.
#### A Practice or Two
Each day for a decan, journal what you’ve learned about your “true face” that was surprising, comforting, or challenging.
For multiple decans, express each of your five faces each day. Arrien has suggestions
- child — time for laughter, play, and fun
- youth — explore and discover a new interest
- adult — make a contribution through your work and creativity
- elder — mentor or inspire another, be of service
- essence — dedicate time to silence and reflection
At the end of a month or for however long you do it, notice which face is most difficult to express consistently and focus on that one for the next month
#### The Gift
The gift is releasing fear, attachment, control, entitlement, and the need to be special. It’s finding self-trust, self-acceptance, and self-validation instead of relying on others for these things.
#### Prompts to Consider
- Which aspects of the ego’s face are you still struggling with: fear, attachment, control, entitlement, or the need to be special?
- What faces are calling to be developed and integrated more fully: child, youth, adult, elder, essence?
- Which of these two obstacles keep you from discovering and trusting your true face: abandoning your true nature for the sake of others’ acceptance and approval; or performing, pretending and hiding because of your egoic preferences to be seen in a desired way?
- What roles, masks or identities are difficult for you to release at this time? What illusory peace that prevents your growth do you not wish to disturb?
- What areas of your life demonstrate your current ability to embody these wisdom gifts: curiosity, flexibility, and self-acceptance? (p.52)
> [!user] [[Angeles Arrien]] in *The Second Half of Life: Opening the eight gates of wisdom*
> The White Picket Gate: Changing Identities, Discovering One’s True Face