Up: [[Hearth Notes]] Created: 2026-01-02 Updated: 2026-01-06 ## Friday [[2026-01-02]] #### Spark Card At the start of every decan I pull a tarot card which I refer to as my spark card. I do some research on the card’s energy — what it’s about, what sorts of actions I might take related to it, what journal prompts I will respond to, and how it might show up as shadow. I hold the card in mind throughout the decan and write about any resonances in my daily note. This decan’s spark card is [[4 of Swords]]. It’s a perfect card for me at this time of year. The winter has always been a time when I’ve wanted to embrace the deep rest and contemplation that accompanies, in my mind, hot cocoa, a roaring fire, and snow mounding up outside. But as much as I love the image, I don’t tend to live it. I hope to this decan. #### The Voice of My Heart This collage card really appealed to me when I made it. But it was my friend Joanne who, when I shared it with her, put words to why it appeals. She said, *The voice of our heart is in our hands. The only thing we truly have control over is our self-expression.* ![[CC 2025-12-28 - 1.webp|300]] _________ ## Saturday [[2026-01-03]] #### Healing Dreams Dreams, even the challenging ones, aren’t “gotchas.” They are always intended to help restore psychic equilibrium Last night I dreamt of my friend, David, who is in long-term care suffering from dementia and aphasia. David was a mentor and a friend, an intelligent and warm-hearted man. It is heartbreaking to know that of all the dreams and plans he and Maureen had for the future are not going to ever come to pass. After we both retired, David and I used to meet every few months for lunch and an afternoon’s chat. Those meetups stopped 6.5 years ago when I moved, just a little bit before his wife saw signs of dementia in David. In the dream, I’m meeting David for several breakfasts during a conference we are attending together. He’s ever so slightly confused but still mostly himself. I wake grateful for the opportunity to be with him again. #### When I Refuse to Surrender Although it has been a perfectly fine day, one where I did all of DOGS CODE (see [[Devotion Elaborated]]) as usual, I was tired of working in my vault. I didn’t let up, didn’t surrender to the tiredness as I should have, and as the [[4 of Swords]] would have me do. As a result, I felt impatient, bored, fed up with the work. I still didn’t let go. The next step was predictable — getting careless with food, wanting sugar for a quick energy hit, and swapping a can of Sprite for the three plus litres of water I’ve been trying to drink every day. It’s hard to not engage in a bit of self-flagellation when a [[Compulsion]] takes over. #### Energy Balls These little snacks have been a life saver when I want sweet, but am trying to avoid processed sugar. - 1c medjool dates, soaked for a few minutes to soften - 1c unsalted cashews or almonds - a touch of sea salt - optional but I use it — ¼ c cocoa powder Blend in a food processor, shape into balls, and keep in the fridge. ___________ ## Sunday [[2026-01-04]] #### Embodiment In my mind, the word “embodiment” has been all caps, billboard size, neon- light surrounded for years. Ever since I started working with Helen (Jungian analyst), I’ve known the importance of being in my body, and the danger of continuing to act as if it’s simply a vehicle for carrying around my mind. And because of that, I’ve made embodiment a huge and fearful thing. I read a Substack post this morning that echoed the hugeness. The author was doing daily 35 minute guided breath work meditations followed by cold plunges. Really? Not only can I not imagine myself doing that, but I have absolutely zero interest in ever trying. I worked with a personal trainer for years and I’m glad I’m done. It’s just not how I want to spend my time. Fortunately, I’ve finally (as in, today) realized that embodiment, like everything else I’m doing this year, can be and should be as simple as taking the next step. That was confirmed when I looked at [[Embodiment - Ground Curriculum]] and realized that there’s nothing huge or overly complicated in any of the actions. Every day I’ve been feeling that I’m not doing enough embodiment work, which is the G (Ground) in my [[Devotion Elaborated]] image. But every day I am doing *something* and that is so much more than ever in the past. And I’m feeling the difference, especially in the self-trust that I’m developing. Today I did a few minutes of breath work, taking five breaths in through my nose, then five out through my nose, thinking of what I’m exhaling and leaving behind from 2025. I did this a bunch of times and found it nicely calming. _____________ ## Monday [[2026-01-05]] #### Thank You Note to Exhaustion Suleika Jaouad is the author of the wonderful *Book of Alchemy*. I’ve paid for her Substack publication this month so that I can follow her January journaling prompts. The one today was particularly powerful, and very on point for the [[4 of Swords]] contemplation that often follows the deep exhaustion of burnout. The prompt was *Write a thank you note to something that exhausted you.* I’m not in burnout any more, thank goodness, but in reviewing my vault notes over the last couple of months I can really see that I have exhausted myself in an obsession over excess weight release. Note: I always refer to it as release, not loss, because what’s lost often gets re-found. I’ve now written a long thank you note in my personal vault and I feel an inner shift and softening of my aggressive attitude towards my body. This was the photo Suleika shared in her post. It was painted by John Singer Sargent in 1911 and is called Nonchaloir (Repose), but to me it’s a great portrayal of flat out exhaustion. ![[Repose John Singer Sargent.webp|400]] ___________ ## Tuesday [[2026-01-06]] ## Wednesday [[2026-01-07]] ## Thursday [[2026-01-08]] ## Friday [[2026-01-09]] ## Saturday [[2026-01-10]] ## Sunday [[2026-01-11]]