Up: [[Pay Attention MOC]] Created: 2023-06-08 Illeism is talking about yourself in the third person, the way Joan used to say to her students, “Mrs. Patterson likes it when you sit up straight.” It sounded to me like what I still think it is — a ridiculous affectation, perhaps even a sign of mental illness! But apparently illeism can be beneficial if you’re trying to make a difficult decision and you need some emotional distance. There’s research done by Igor Grossmann from the University of Waterloo which shows that people often do a better job giving advice to others than they do for themselves. Grossman referred to this as Solomon’s Paradox after the Biblical king who used to advise others wisely, but made lousy personal decisions that apparently left his kingdom in chaos. The idea is that if you speak in the third person, as if you were advising someone else, you’ll be able to recognize other perspectives and will be more willing to reach compromise. When Grossmann had people keep a daily journal in the third person, they said that they felt more positive, less sad and frustrated, after dealing with challenging events.