Up: [[Life Writing]] Created: 2023-06-28 Updated: 2025-01-19 In [[Marion Milner's Self-Exploration Study]] she undertakes a seven year quest to discover what makes her happy. Although it’s never explicitly said in the book, or in the introduction by another author, it seems to me that Milner changes quite quickly from a focus on happiness to one of studying her own mind in all its various emotions. One of her conclusions is that ==you see only when you are intent on noticing==. The same is true of the moments I choose for beams. There’s no arbitrary selecting happening. [[Deciding to Write Beams]] demands self-awareness and close attention to the world. I think there are actually three kinds of moments, forming a continuum of time, awareness and attention when I’m writing a beam. It’s easy and tempting to view it as also a continuum of quality. But I don’t want to assume that. Instead, I want to experiment. ### A Continuum of Moments The most common kind of moment is the one we miss. It can be likened to dashing into the grocery store minutes before closing and grabbing whatever catches your eye. It’s a moment where attention and awareness are fleeting. Only later, when casting about for something/anything to write in a Beam, might you remember that the bananas were piled particularly artfully or that the cashier made an offhand comment that you’re still thinking about. A second kind of moment is a big step up in attention and awareness. The author of [[Zen Camera]], David Ulrich, takes photos of moments quickly and spontaneously, but he has trained to be ready for those moments. We can do the same by practicing the mindfulness and savouring techniques described in [[PAY ATTENTION]]. In the early days, this is going to feel clunky and unnatural. We might spend a lot of our time actively scanning our environment asking, “Is this Beam-worthy?” Eventually, though, I believe that we can get better at spotting the [[Decisive Moment]], that moment that is at the heart of the event or the day. Decisive moments are individually chosen; no one can say you’ve picked the wrong one. However, a decisive moment tells the story and the meaning of the event or time period. It requires immersion in the experience, self-awareness, and close attention. ### Questions I’m Asking Myself - Will my Beams change as I grow in self-awareness and attentiveness? - Is whatever I choose for a Beam automatically my decisive moment of the day simply because I’ve chosen it out of all others? - What is the difference, if there is a difference, between the [[Freewriting]] I do in forced response to a randomly chosen photograph and one that I have selected as my moment for that day?